Apologies for the lack of posts on here!
This one is close to home. Let’s talk suicide.
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A poem. Of Ephraim.
I, a pauper,
Said that receiving love
Was equal to debt;
Not reciprocating received love
Ensured that interest accumulated by the second
And every passing, unfruitful day became a burden.
And so lovers became bailiffs
Who ransacked me of all I had,
And romancers tax collectors
Who squeezed and seized anything leftover.
Receiving love would always cost me
And revealing a part of me could cost me everything.
And this is how I once considered love.
My heart naive –
Led astray by the winds –
Was oblivious to the obscure darkness I was in,
Blowing me to and fro one place to another.
Oblivious to my opaque and oblique surroundings,
Oblivious to my present day oblivion
That taught me that love could take
With the pretence to give,
That love could take and continue to take at will,
And that for love,
One could manipulate and do as he willed.
And this is how I once considered love.
Yet in an instant,
My perspective of love –
Maligned, hurt, broken and twisted by fear and pain –
Was made perfect.
The Lover’s love –
Him being Love
Made me know love,
And the Lover loved me
So I am called the Loved.
I am no longer a pauper
Because now I am a prince
Rich in love!
And this love cost me nothing
But cost Him everything.
And now I am joined to Him,
This love too,
Will cost me everything.
For this love cleared all my debt,
Lifting every burden,
Making this love unpayable,
Making this love
At a priceless price.
For pure love gives with no intention to take,
And pure love gives and continues to give.
And this is how I now consider love.
“For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.”
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An introduction to my new YouTube channel!
This is my creative mind within my creative God!
“Lovesick” is a poem that is close to my heart because of how it simply encapsulates all my creative pursuits:
That in every single pursuit, my constant cry will be the desire (for all) to know Him. John 17:3 “And this is eternal life, that they may know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom You have sent.”
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“Now in the place where He was crucified there was a garden, and in the garden a new tomb in which no one had yet been laid.”
By God I cannot sleep.
My body is weary
But my eyes stand upright in fear
In anxiety and fright.
They have gone from being
My tools of sight to my bane
For they refuse to forget what they have witnessed.
Hour by hour,
I twist and turn to seek a cooler side
For my heavy heart to lay upon.
Only to remember,
The love of my heart,
The heat and fire to my soul
My mind casts back to the
Events of the day prior.
I am shaken to my bone,
Perplexed to my skull,
Spiralling in and out my sleep.
He who is mine,
Who was by my side for three good years,
Is nowhere to be seen,
No where to be found.
They tainted Him,
Spat on Him,
And engraved their hate of Him upon His skin.
My own skin shivers at the memory of His own –
Rejected by His own kind.
Could my LORD really return?
O God spare my soul this grief.
He would have saved Himself from the Cross.
He could have punished the accusers.
He would have proved them all wrong.
But I watched as they solemnly wrapped
And placed His body in the tomb
And rolled the stone.
I am resigned to this fact,
That they took the One I love from me,
And I will never see Him again.
The love I thought would
Always be with Me,
Twitter & Instagram:
I am the lost sheep.
The black amongst the white,
The one out of the ninety-nine,
The prodigal son.
Unworthy yet welcomed.
Once a sinner but now a saint.
Lost yet now found.
My own feet led me to the brink of despair
But His hand led me to pastures green.
It is His outstretched hand
That saved me from the Pit of Hades.
It is His rod of sustenance,
That is my reminder of His mercy for me.
He has taken me thus far,
And promises me further beyond the horizon.
Though the trail may be rough,
Though the path may be tough;
Take His hand, child
And clasp onto it.
His hand will be your shelter,
He will guide you every step of the Way –
Through the waters
And the coals of fire –
He is the Way to the land of milk and honey.
“I am the Good Shepherd; and I know My sheep, and am known by My own.”
Twitter & Instagram: SongsOfEphraim
A Psalm of Ephraim.
“To be aligned with Christ is to be aligned with His heart. To be aligned with His heart is to be aligned with His will.” E.K.
Blessed is He who hears the formulation of our thoughts toward Him.
Blessed is the Lord for His mercies never run dry.
Align me Father!
When my feet are not cemented in your will.
Loose me from my folly,
Chasten me when my wisdom overtakes yours.
For now I stand on your Word,
I stand tall in your promises.
On the cliff overlooking the battle,
I shall not fear,
For you keep my weapons sharp
And my armour ashine.
And I will take up my crown,
My identity in you.
“But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, to those who believe in His name: who were born, not of blood, nor of the will of the flesh, nor of the will of man, but of God.” John 1:12-13
A Psalm of Ephraim.
“Revive our gaze upon Your face and expose the things that have taken Your place”
– Eric Gilmour
Behold the one who cannot be mentioned in the same breath as man.
The angels continuously cry “Holy, Holy” at the mere look of His shadow
For His true light blinds the eyes of all who gaze at Him.
Lo! The lamb whose wool never greys
His radiance illuminates the sun itself!
Worthy is He to be praised!
“One thing I have desired of the LORD, That will I seek: That I may dwell in the house of the LORD All the days of my life, To behold the beauty of the LORD, And to inquire in His temple.”
Psalms 27:4 NKJV
A Psalm of Ephraim. To Maximen.
I hear your every prayer.
Did you know I catch your every tear?
Every drop of sweat
Even when you are all alone
I am there.
My daughter. My princess.
My fair damsel.
Why are you in distress?
Do you not know my love for you
Stretches beyond Lucifer’s pitfall of despair?
Can even the breadth of the oceans compare?
Even when you fall
Do you not know my love will chase you to the ends of the Earth?
Lest you stumble on the path that is narrow
My angels will lift you up,
Far above the clusters of Pleiades*
And into my unblemished glory.
At conception you were marked with my seal
And bestowed with my crown.
Even when man disappoints
I AM the I AM.
Serve this generation.
I am still your God.
You are still breathing,
Thus it is not yet finished.
“And behold, the LORD passed by, and a great and strong wind tore into the mountains and broke the rocks in pieces before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind; and after the wind an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake; and after the earthquake a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire; and after the fire a still small voice.” 1 Kings 19:11-12
A Contemplation of Ephraim (Inspired by Psalm 22).
Ever prayed and wondered and even doubted if God had heard your prayer? Or worse, if He had forgotten about you?
O God do you not hear the every prayer of my lips?
Is it not you who adheres to my needs?
Do you not see every tear that spills from my cheeks?
Are you not with me in the furnace and waterfall of fire?
Surely it is you who scents danger for my sake?
For the colour of my tears in the day runs like the blood of warfare
In the night it mourns aloud
Grave like the widow behind her veil.
Where art thou O God?
Let the generations past and to come know of Your name
Active One, take hold of my bearings, my troubles
Do not let me be tossed to and fro,
Let Your foot be my anchor in deep.
Guide me, O bright Morning Star, to the land of milk and honey!
There I will taste the goodness of Your palace!
I will feast on your banquet of love and grace!
I will rejoice, for your presence is my reassurance and my peace.
My God, My God, why have you forsaken Me?
Why are You so far from helping Me,
And from the words of My groaning?
[King David the Psalmist]
A song of forgiveness.
After sinning against God, I felt like my prayers were hitting a stone wall. Lost on what to do, I was led to write down my thoughts. Amazingly, they began to take the form of a song (I had never written a song before). How beautiful and loving is God? He used my pitfall to be the start of something new in me. So here is Psalm 151 – a play on the last psalm of the Bible being number 150. I pray it speaks to your heart and soul.
Cleanse Me O God
From the very inside out.
Hear my voice Lord
As my heart longs to hear you.
Hear my pardon Lord
When I’ve turned away from you
When I’ve denied you,
And disappointed you.
But now I only want your will
I only need your power,
I only need your strength.
For in my iniquities You are strong
And in my weakness, You are mighty.
You have heard my cry
And You have seen my heart.
For Your Spirit heals
And Your Hand reassures.
And you protect.
For only You forgive
And only You are just.
“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.”
1 John 1:9